Singledom

“You’re single, huh? So, what’s wrong with you?”

The next person that asks me that is going to get a look of sheer disgust before I turn and walk away. Really, how rude is that question?

In case you’re wondering the same thing, here’s the answer…I’m waiting for the right person and I don’t plan on settling. Happy now?

Does that mean I’m waiting for Prince Charming? Nope. He doesn’t exist. Disney can go to hell for perpetuating that bit of fraudulent thinking.

Does it mean I’m waiting for the the “perfect” person or the “perfect” relationship. Nope. No one is perfect. NO. ONE. And no relationship is perfect – they all take time, energy, and effort.

What it means is that I’m trying to take an adult approach to picking the person I want to spend the rest of my life with and parent with. THE REST OF MY LIFE, people. And PARENTING, people. That’s big s**t.

I wrote about using your whole brain when it comes to picking a partner a while back and I still stand by that. Therefore, I’ve passed over several prospects since writing that post. They weren’t the right people for many reasons.

And then I read this article recently and was reminded why going through all of this is important. And I felt encouraged because I’m mid-way up that staircase, folks. And I do know what I want, which is something even married people may not know. And I don’t care if you think I’m overly rational about this, or too concerned about this, or a weirdo.

As for this segment:

In our world, the major rule is to get married before you’re too old — and “too old” varies from 25-35, depending on where you live. The rule should be “whatever you do, don’t marry the wrong person,” but society frowns much more upon a 37-year-old single person than it does an unhappily married 37-year-old with two children. It makes no sense — the former is one step away from a happy marriage, while the latter must either settle for permanent unhappiness or endure a messy divorce just to catch up to where the single person is.

I’ll take 37 and single over an unhappy marriage any day of the week. And instead of feeling sorry for me and wondering what’s wrong with me, I wish you’d see me as a self-aware bad ass who’s going about all this in a thoughtful manner because that’s what something as huge and profound as marriage and parenting deserves.

And there’s my rant. And yes, I did start a lot of sentences with and just now. Shove it.

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4 Comments

  1. The guy that you pick will have found the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

    Reply
  2. Sean C.

     /  February 28, 2014

    I really hate reading your writing when it rings true into my neocortex, and I’m not fully listening/using it. ;) Very strange is this connection of reading *your* inner thoughts and having them resonate so with mine, nearly anonymously. 2014 context, who’d have thought this layer of social interaction would have ever been…

    Thanks for being such a person with integrity, reminding us that we all need to be the best we can be. (Now could you stop reminding me how much work I have to do?! …kidding)

    Much love Annie, keep up the work; you really are an inspiration, whether you know it or not!.

    Reply
    • Ha, Sean! Funny how people line up sometimes and how they don’t sometimes! And yes, this layer of “social” interaction is both a blessing and just plain weird!

      Thank you so much for your kind words, for reading, and for reaching out!

      Reply

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